Rant

Damn it. Why is my movie I’m watching illegally online buffering so much? This isn't what I didn’t pay for!

Rant

I'm watching YouTube videos of the Rocking New Year's Eve concerts that I missed, and it occurs to me that music was better when ugly people were allowed to make it.

Rant

To be fair, we should have a holiday in November to balance out Valentines Day by making people feel bad about having people who love them.

Oh wait, I forgot about Thanksgiving dinner. Nevermind.

Journal

At 14, all my mom could talk about was how getting a girl pregnant would ruin my life.  At 34, all my mom can talk about is how never getting a girl pregnant has ruined her life.

Journal

Sure, by my age my grandfather had fought a war, bought a farm, married, and had two kids, but I've got a phone that plays music AND video games.  Who's got time for kids with all that on my plate?

Journal

I want a girl I can take to Ikea, not in some bullshit "500 Days of Summer" way but because she's seriously passionate about Swedish design practices.

Journal

Whenever I pass a person preaching the apocalypse on a street corner, I just wanna stop, hand him a book of Lovecraft and ask "Have you read the Good News?"

Seriously.  Every Revelations preacher is just a goth kid who never blossomed, and it's all I can do not to help them along their way.